DO YOU EVER FEEL LIKE LIFE IS WORKING AGAINST YOU?
I was walking to the train station the other day, and I was stopped by a man asking me for some small change. Considering I had just run back home to get my keycard because I was lacking in loose change myself, I was hardly in a position to relieve his state of financial despair. I couldn’t help but wonder, was he genuine, or was he just scrounging up money for his next hit?
It would have been easy to assume the latter (something I am sure most of us do), however my curious nature wanted to know more. I have always thought it would make a fascinating documentary, to take a camera out on the streets and talk to homeless people to find out what decision they made or road they decided to take in life that led them to being on the streets.
“I’m backed into a bad end at the moment”, he said. He had to leave his home because of a Jerry Springer type scenario involving his brother and the mother of his child. With most of his friends involved in crime, he had to turn to the streets and the Salvos. He is now on the waiting list for a house and will receive his first Centrelink payment in a couple of days. Until then he has to take his chances with the public for a meal, and seek refuge wherever he can from the cold Melbourne nights.
The Salvation Army in the city offers a free lunch to the homeless, but he arrived too late and was only able to have a couple of bread rolls. On the second day, when making his way on the train for lunch, he was fined for getting on the train without a ticket. Not even the Salvation Army ringing Metro to explain that they told him to get on the train without a ticket would have them reverse the fine. The kicker is that his fine escalates every time he is unable to pay it by the due date, and he will eventually end up in court.
What I found remarkable was that although he was clearly struggling (and no amount of positive thinking was going to make that crappy situation better), he was not defeated. I could sense that this guy was a survivor. But, I still can’t help but wonder where he is tonight, and hope he isn’t hungry and is safe from the cold.
Never underestimate the strength of the human spirit to navigate us through tough times. There will be times in your life when things go to shit. Times when you feel like you are banging your head against a wall. Times when you wonder just how much more you can take. Times when you wonder whether it’s ever going to come together.
These are the times when you need to look life square in the eye. Times when you may need to reevaluate where you are, because you might be out of sync. Times when you need to trust that the reason things aren’t working out, is because life might have something better in store for you that you would never have discovered if the thing you thought you wanted worked out. Times when you put your head up, your shoulders back and tits forward and keep moving towards what you want, because just when you think things are never going to shift or get better, something miraculously comes along.
You see, sometimes in life we are tested. Really tested. Life’s natural ups and downs, and ebbs and flows, shape us with their wisdom and call on us to develop our strength, courage, endurance and patience. Then something breaks. We meet someone with knowledge, a new perspective or an opportunity. We get a new job or client. Something falls in our lap. Suddenly, that difficult passage becomes something from our past. Something we look back on. Something we draw strength from. Something we use to become the best we can be.
Never give up – you just never know what’s around the corner.
WOW. This was beyond inspiring. What a great article. Thank-you so much.
xo
Hi G:)
I have a challenge for you….
How much does your online, and blogging life interact with your real life?
Is it a big part of it?
Is it really separate?
Or is your blog a mechanism to improve your real life or your business?
I will answer these tomorrow:)
Have a great evening – SP
I feel like you wrote this just for me today! Thanks
Such a strong message Gaynor. I would add that when faced with these times where you, me or anyone is feeling so weighed down that the thought of lifting your head & straightening your shoulders can seem to much – set yourself a focus, such as I will “lift my head up, put my shoulders back and tits forward and keep moving” until I get to the front gate and then I will re-evaluate …sometimes the most important thing is getting thru one life moment before moving onto the next and this approach will opens us up to the opportunity around the corner that we can work with to be the best we can be.
On another note I would like to share with you the story of a young man that I worked with on a mental health team and the series of events he faced and the outcome…..
This young man with a mental illness was in his early twenties one day he headed into town to hock his TV, stopped by a policeman wondering what he was up to, taken to the station to “check” things out, discovered that he had many unpaid fines and unfinished community service (that was given to him while psychotic & living a disorganised life) , sent straight to the watch house before heading to jail for 6 months (I found this out from a distraught phone call from flatmate), no social security benefits paid while in jail (rent unable to be paid – lost flat), on release 2 weeks of social security paid, no contact with mental health service made , young man did not return “home” instead headed to Fortitude Valley and partied hard for a few weeks, when he returned to “home” – no house & mental health not good (no medication + recreational drugs = bad combination) – this continued for many months until one day a friends took him to local mental health service for admission. Admission refused due to drug use. This young man jumped off the roof of a muti-storied building and died.
There holes are too big in our community that people like the young man that I worked with and the man that you met can become lost in.
Thanks for this great article…Looking forward to reading more from you.
I never have change on me these days. Blame the omnipresent eftpos machines and the very hungry parking meters. But when I first truly encountered homelessness on the streets of London I was out of change for a different reason.
Because every person I saw on the streets got whatever I could give them. Even working in a pub and seeing my change returned to me over the bar couldn’t stop me. Because, let’s face it, if we were homeless I think we’d want a drink to numb the pain too. I want a drink when my day has gone bad because I had some minor disaster or other. If my whole life was a disaster I think a few drinks would definitely be required. So, who are we to judge what people use the money on? Food, drink, whatever. It’s their choice.
I’d rather give and not judge than judge and not give.
Because my dreams are still haunted by the man on Tottenham Crt Rd whose lack of front teeth gave his “spare some change” a distinctive whistling sound.
Oh how i needed to be reminded of this today… thankyou Gaynor. xxx
You give me shivers Ms Alder! Every article you write seems to apply to me in that day or week.
x
I’m so glad I stumbled upon your writings
Teegs
Times when you put your head up, your shoulders back and tits forward and keep moving towards what you want, because just when you think things are never going to shift or get better, something miraculously comes along
LOVE IT.